How to get ‘in flow’ so you have the energy to do anything – Birds on the Blog

How to get ‘in flow’ so you have the energy to do anything

I’m sharing this story because I know there are other women out there who feel like I do back in April. Lost. Confused. Uncertain.

Feeling ‘on fire’

When I met with my mastermind group last night, one of the women commented “Sherry where do you get your energy from? You are ‘on fire’ at the moment. What are you taking? Everything about you has a different energy. Even your newsletters, your podcast … “

And it’s true. At times over the past couple of weeks I have felt ‘on fire’. Ready to tackle the world. As if I could do anything. Things are just happening. Opportunities are landing at my feet. Former colleagues are reaching out to me for help to implement the Women in Finance Charter. If you are a woo-woo type of person, you might tell me that the Universe has heard me.

Earlier in the week, I’d talked to my business mastermind group, and our leader asked me “Sherry, come on share your secrets. What are you doing that’s different? What’s going on? Tell us more”. 

What’s my ‘in flow’ secret?

My secret? I am focusing on ONE thing. Everything I do and think about now is all about helping ambitious women balance work and life more confidently. It’s all about nurturing, encouraging, supporting, pushing, coaxing, inspiring those women who work in technology, finance and professional services. Women who are ambitious about their career and happen to be mothers. Women who love their work and love their family. Women who want success in the workplace and happiness at home.

The back story

I have been running my business for nearly 5 years. From April onwards, I had been feeling ‘lost’. I couldn’t put my finger on what was wrong. I’d been specialising in helping women go back to work after a career break. And I’d had some fabulous successes. However it didn’t feel 100% right. And I didn’t know why. I know the work I do is deeper, more intense, than pure career or business coaching. That’s the counsellor training and experience within me. However I have a logical, analytical mind … helping people with the deeper more powerful stuff ‘on its own’ is not enough. I am task-focused. ‘Just’ doing personal development will bore me.

In August I took on a piece of short-term contract work to provide technology support to a law firm, in the middle of a software rollout. And I loved being back in the City. I kept bumping into friends that I hadn’t seen for a while.

Other business women gave me various “find your avatar” “discover your ideal customer” type worksheets. But that on its own was not working. I’m brilliant at writing a description of my avatar or ideal customer … down to the detail of their favourite brand of coffee or what they like to drink on a Friday night. But if you don’t know WHO your ideal customer is, I’m just describing somebody I can imagine, not somebody I can touch or talk to. I’m writing the avatar for who I think might be my ideal customer not who IS. If that makes sense.

Is it marketing?

Perhaps it’s a marketing problem? I had a conversation with marketing expert, Lucy Whittington. I have worked with Lucy before and she’s simply brilliant. She helped me find my ‘Thing’ in the first place. My Thing is confidence. I’ve known that for a long time. I knew that I wanted to work with women. Lucy suggested I go back to my roots. She pointed out “You’ve loved the time you’ve spent in the City this month … why not focus on those ambitious women who love their careers and happen to be mothers. After all, that’s you to a T.”

I have to admit, I was not convinced. Sceptical, I talked to Sarah Buchanan-Smith and decided to work with her for a few weeks. I was still feeling lost however I thought, let’s try Lucy’s idea. Let’s focus on ambitious women who work in the City. Let’s start with the sectors I know best: technology, legal and finance. I can focus. I really can. I love the City. I really do. I want women to feel powerful. It’s really true.

On fire

Here we are 3 months later, I am on fire. Once I got started, I couldn’t stop.

I have launched my podcast Confident Conversations. I’m interviewing incredible women (including two of the BBC Apprentice candidates); I am getting bookings to speak at Women in Technology events; I have been invited to attend the launch of CMI Women; my blog posts only talk to one audience (ambitious women in technology, legal and finance). I am in the City more often (and I do love it). I know which networking events to attend. My workplace challenges survey attracted 200+ women in a matter of days (still time to respond if you haven’t yet). Every idea I come up with, I am powering through. I mentioned just once, my Women’s Confident Leadership programme, on Facebook and suddenly a flurry of women calling to find out more.

More importantly I AM LOVING IT.

The secret

The secret, as Gary Keller says, is to focus on ONE THING. I’ve written about his book before and knew that I just had to focus on one thing. But until now, I hadn’t figured out what that one thing is.

If you want to get ‘in flow’ so you have the energy to do anything, like me, then it’s a matter of deciding to focus on just one thing. It’s as simple as that. But I also know it’s as difficult as that too. If like me, you’re struggling to find what your one thing should be, give yourself permission to ask for help. Like I did in August when I talked to Lucy and Sarah. Give yourself permission to not have to work it out on your own. Talk to somebody like me. I’d love to have a chat.

(And yes, more than once, it has struck me …  the irony of being a confidence coach helping other women to get clear on what they really want to do … and not being able to figure that out myself. But as Lucy says, even the best hairdresser can’t cut the hair on the back of her own head.)

If you want to be ‘in flow’ …

The secret to being ‘in flow’ is simple. JUST ONE THING.


About the Author Sherry Bevan

It can be hard to balance career and family. Sherry helps ambitious women get clear on what they really want, then find the confidence to do it. If today's the day, you want to put your head in your hands and cry, know you are not alone. Why not check out these tips on how to cope with overwhelm. Coach | Author | Speaker | Dog sitter

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