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I don’t want us to have a love- hate relationship anymore!

More than anyone, I took time to get to know you, understand you and feel you out before plunging in. While all my girlfriends were busy romancing you, I was cautious. Finally with insurmountable peer pressure, I caved in and became part of your ever growing community of users.

In the last few years of our courtship, you have been good to me. You’ve updated me with pictures and kept me on track with status updates from classmates, work colleagues, family and friends. You through your clever algorithms connected with me friends, acquaintances and long lost family members whom I otherwise would have never found. You’ve given me the opportunity to rekindle my once lost romance with former flames. You’ve even helped me keep a track on my boyfriend! You enticed me and satisfied my voyeuristic tendencies. Thanks to you, since my entry into this new world of social media, my boyfriend has even learned the art of being careful about what he puts up online. Don’t get me wrong- I am grateful for all of these vantages.

But now I am done! And I mean it! I gave you my true self and my whole self. But you’ve done nothing to treat me better. I woke up every day into your arms only to see the number of messages that you would send me about how terribly I should lose weight. I thought you knew me through all my pictures? Do I really deserve this? You kept advising me how I should shed twenty lbs or how Christina Aguilera got sexy after trying a crazy diet. You flashed pictures of such unrealistic women in bikini bodies and proposed that I should try it. One message, two message I can take it. I shouldn’t. But I can. I am tough woman. But every day? How many messages will you throw at me? How many times will you remind me that I am worthless? That I’m never good enough! That I need to lose weight to look beautiful? Pleasing? Sexy? Attractive? – All for you? Or are they for all your naughty users that YOU connected me to?

Stop bullying me! I suffer from exercise anorexia and I’m a recovering addict from an eating disorder that has consumed a good chunk of my life. I grew up with a distorted image of my own body and over the last few years, you have pushed me down the deep dark hole again. Do I really deserve this? Does the rest of the woman world warrant this? Do I need to wake up everyday morning being reminded that I am really worthless because I don’t have the most perfect body? Do I need to go to bed being prodded of my imperfections?

Over and over again you have made me feel inadequate. Through your scheming ways you ensured that I never rise above this vicious cycle. You may call term this marketing, or strategy or ways to generate income to provide a free service. But what do you call people who make money off of other peoples insecurities? Perpetrators? Outlaws? There are terms coined appropriately for individuals. But how about for an entire system? Leave me alone. Leave us – all women folks alone. Why do you only prey on us and send us these messages? Why not the male world? Doesn’t your marketing team want to pry on the insecurities of men too?

Glad to be over. But truth be told, I’m grateful to have experienced you. Without knowing you, I would have never realized the value of my prince charming. To my man, who worships me in bed and makes me feel so complete- thank you for reminding me every day how beautiful I am. I feel so loved. To all the men in my life who provide me with such positivism, and encouragement- if we women didn’t have you, the media would have had us down in the deep dark depths repeatedly beating us down. And to all the men out there- who never pass comments on our looks but talk to us for what we are worth; whether you realize it or not- we feel respected!

susanvargheseBio: Susan Varghese is an avid reader, writer and lover of life. She is a Talent Acquisition Specialist by profession and enjoys being with children when she’s not working. You can find out more about her at

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